Mesmerizing
After two minutes my screen saver shows me what I’ve been up to for the past few years.
There’s no story to screen savers. Watching it there’s no narrative arc, no drama, no tension or suspense, no beginning or end even. I mean, not really. Not intentionally at least.
It just moves. From one image to the next, and the next. One slide moves to reveal another. Another slide moves. Wait for it. Another image. It keeps going. Wait. There. It’s mesmerizing.
Other people have told me the same when they’ve stared at my screen saver for a little while. It’s mesmerizing.
It holds my attention.
I get curious.
How does it know what images to pull?
What will appear next?
Oh, that one.
I could do better now.
I’ll go back to it.
Oooh, that one is fantastic.
I remember it, that was so amazing to do.
Oh gosh, and that one was so early on!
Wait, have I already seen that one?
That arrangement is better than what I could have done.
How does it know?
What is it looking for?
Is there some AI that’s algorithmically choosing them?
Is it by color, shape, arrangement, orientation, or kind?
Or is it all random?
Screen saver. The words. Synonyms for screen are a cover, or to filter or select. Synonyms for saver are collector or gatherer. My computer filters my collection, it selects what I’ve gathered. It’s a cover of all that I’ve gathered. That’s it. But it’s not everything, too.
It’s beyond each image of the screensaver where the story - a glimpse of an experience - is saved.
I think my screen saver is like a map of a hiking trail. I’m standing there, staring at the map in front of me with both hands, while the map conceals the hiking trail right underneath me. Curiosity fills onto the map, imagining where I am, or where I’ve been, or how far until the next mark. I’m looking and looking. It can be mesmerizing, like what’s beyond the map, too.
What’s beyond the screensaver? The stories. The real experience of all my art these past two years. I’ve finally found the right path with my art. I’m walking forward, enjoying the meandering and unpredictable ways of my art. My stride is filled with joy. The story arcs have been wildly varied.
Some hills have been really steep, breathing deep just to make it. Even downhills haven’t been so easy, not like I once thought. Clambering over rocks is actually fun. Muddy spots are not. Narrow winding trails open up to amazing overlooks. Unmarked side paths are worth exploring. The strangest things will catch my attention. It’s worth looking closer, too. Look up sometimes, I say, to the canopy of trees above, swaying and waving down at me. They know where they are. In this place right here.
Where am I on the map? I check. Maybe here. I’m not sure.
What does my screensaver say? I check. I was there. I had that experience. And that one, too. Wait. There. Watch. There, too.
There’s always so much more to the story than what’s there. Keep looking. It can be mesmerizing.
✻
LouLou
“Mesmerizing” was originally published as an exclusive post to my Patreon supporters in May 2022. Now it’s available to you, too!
And I’m excited to announce that from December 2022, I’m switching to Ko-fi!
Ko-fi is also an online creator platform and makes it easy for fans to financially support creatives with either a one-time donation or signing up for a monthly subscription. It is where I share early access and exclusive content of my creative process, original stories, and inspiration. My work explores fiber arts, nature gathering, mark making, photography, and writing.
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Thank you, each of you, for supporting my ongoing creative work. It means so much and I am grateful. Much of the art and writing on this website is because of you!
A big shout out to my wonderful supporters! Thank you, each of you, for supporting my ongoing creative work – Julie B, Sharmila K, Sushmita M, Kori J, Marga F, Kara B, Kristina L, Laura C, Louise B, Beck C, Skip M, Chris Z, and Richie M. It means so much and I am grateful. I think of you as create these posts, what I write about and share, and I hope that it offers you insight and inspiration along the way.
